Decisions loom in the not too distant future....

Okay, so I'm not sure how to describe today. I did go pick up the application packet for the foster-to-adopt at the new agency we are looking at. The lady was very nice and had me do a quick informal questionnaire. Everything was going great until she asked about pets. "Do we have pets?" I of course said yes and explained how involved we are with our fur-kids. She seemed bummed and said that she would have to talk to the main Director to see if our dogs were going to be a "set-back". So judging from the reaction I got. I am assuming that we will be a "No Go". Which is very sad, but at the same time, we still have others doors to pursue. 

So when I got home, Ryan and I had a talk. He is so very supportive and let me know that, while he is okay with adoption...he'd really rather not go through the foster care system. He's just heard too many horror stories and doesn't want to be heart broken. I did try to explain to him that no matter what path we follow....there is always heartbreak. So he really, really wants a natural child and it breaks my hear that I cannot provide that. So as I sit here, I am looking at the packet and thinking: "Why do I even try?" Then I think, there is a reason God has placed this "need/feeling" on my heart and that no matter what road we choose, as long as we follow and trust in HIM then everything will turn out fine.

So now I am researching everything I can on domestic and international adoption. Talk about EXPENSIVE!!!!!!!! I am thinking of fundraisers and other ways we can raise money for which ever type we choose (domestic or international) According to several sites Domestic Adoption runs $8,000- $30,000 respectively and International Adoptions runs $10,000 - $40,000. While that is a lot of money to us and millions of others, it really doesn't matter in the long scheme of it all. Yes it may take us longer to accomplish this, but if this is what God wants for us, then nothing can stop us! Because in the end....all that matters is God's unconditional love that we can show to whomever, He places with us and the love that we can give to the child.